Thirsting for God

I was looking at Psalm 42 while preparing for a devotion:

"As a deer pants for flowing streams,

so pants my soul for you, O God.

2 My soul thirsts for God,

for the living God.

When shall I come and appear before God?”

We talked about the difference between saying you hunger after God and “My soul thirsts for God”. When you are hungry it can be intense and distracting, but usually you can go on with what you are doing. The hungry feeling goes away and comes back more intense the next time. But if you are thirsty, it is very distracting and hard to think about anything else until you quench that thirst. Do we thirst for God like that?

5 Why are you cast down, O my soul,

and why are you in turmoil within me?

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,

my salvation and my God.    (see context below)

I love how honest the Psalmist is with God! Honesty is so important in any relationship if you want to be close, but in no relationship is it more important than in our relationship with God. What keeps us from being completely honest with God? Do we not want to take the time? Are we afraid God won't like what we have to say? If we are honest with God will it force us to be honest with ourselves – and we don't really want to go there? Whatever the obstacle – remove it and start being honest with the Sovereign God of the universe who loved the world so much that he sent his only Son to die so that whoever believes in him would not perish but have everlasting life (see John 3:16).

I also love how the Psalmist speaks truth to himself “Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.” Where does this come from? God's word is truth and we need to be reading it every day. And when we are strugging, we can go to his word and find what we need. But what if we don't have a Bible or our phone handy? How much better to hide his word in our hearts, so that when the time comes the Holy Spirit can bring it to the forefront of our minds. Memorize God's word and be strategic about it. We all have stuggle areas. Why not memorize something that speaks to the struggle you have? And if you need suggestions, ask a trusted friend or an older brother or sister in Christ.

42 As a deer pants for flowing streams,
    so pants my soul for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God,
    for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God?
3 My tears have been my food
    day and night,
while they say to me all the day long,
    “Where is your God?”
4 These things I remember,
    as I pour out my soul:
how I would go with the throng
    and lead them in procession to the house of God
with glad shouts and songs of praise,
    a multitude keeping festival.

5 Why are you cast down, O my soul,
    and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
    my salvation 6 and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;
    therefore I remember you
from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,
    from Mount Mizar.
7 Deep calls to deep
    at the roar of your waterfalls;
all your breakers and your waves
    have gone over me.
8 By day the Lord commands his steadfast love,
    and at night his song is with me,
    a prayer to the God of my life.
9 I say to God, my rock:
    “Why have you forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning
    because of the oppression of the enemy?”
10 As with a deadly wound in my bones,
    my adversaries taunt me,
while they say to me all the day long,
    “Where is your God?”

11 Why are you cast down, O my soul,
    and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
    my salvation and my God.        ESV

I Am a Slave

I looked up a resource for reflecting on my identity in Christ and came across this: My Identity in Christ. I spent some time in 1 Corinthians 6 and focused on these verses (see context below):

19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

In thinking about my identity in Christ, I thought it was really important to see that I am not my own, I have been bought with a price, the precious blood of Jesus Christ (1 Peter 1:18-19). It reminded me of Pastor Greene's sermon a couple of weeks ago when he was talking about slaves and masters. He pointed out that God is our Master and we are His slaves, not in the African American slave trade sense, but in the Old Testament Hebrew slave system sense (it would take a lot to fully explain that and I'm not going to do that here). The master would provide for his slaves and they would be part of his household, but the slave would be obligated to obey his master always, any time. I thought of how this is different from a job. One goes to work and listens to their boss, but when they come home, their time is their own. I realized that this is often how I look at my obligation to God. I do the things I think God wants me to do and then it is my time to do what I want to do. Well, if God is really my Master, then I must obey Him 24/7. I realized the thought of this did not make me happy! I did not think I would like doing what God wants me to do all the time. I want time to do what I think is fun. How sad that I am believing a lie that I would not have joy obeying my heavenly Father. I need my mind to be transformed! I believe. Help my unbelief!

12 “All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. 13 “Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food”—and God will destroy both one and the other. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 14 And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! 16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. 18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. From 1 Corinthians 6 ESV

Beloved? More Questions Than Answers

“and a voice came from heaven, “'You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.'” Luke 3:22b

I read this and tears came to my eyes. “Do you really feel this way about me, God? Am I your beloved? Are you pleased with me?”

I know this is God the Father talking to Jesus and he wasn't talking to me. But there are plenty of passages that speak of God's love for us:

16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” from John 3

and

8 “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” from Romans 5

But that is speaking of the masses. Somehow I don't feel like God loves me, Kimberly Ann Kuhr White, when I read those verses. And I know there is a disconnect. Sure, if someone were to ask me if God loves me I would say yes. I know it in my head. But it has not fully penetrated my heart and mind. And that is seen in my actions as I continue to seek love and approval from other people rather than have my relational needs met fully in Him.

There are other verses I go to that seem more personal to me:

He will tend his flock like a shepherd;

he will gather the lambs in his arms;

he will carry them in his bosom,

and gently lead those that are with young. Isaiah 40:11

I love this picture of a tender shepherd's love.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1John 3:1

I love that in 1John 2 (and throughout the book) John calls them, “Beloved” and “My little children”, and “My dear children”. I know this is John addressing them, but somehow it speaks of the Father's love to me.

I started recounting all the ways that God has shown love to me by His provision for me: giving me Geoff as a husband; giving me 11 beautiful children; surprise packages left on our doorstep that are still a mystery to us; sending Emily Bentz and then Deb Warning to our house just in time for Mary Ann to go to the hospital; providing food, schooling, and care for our other children while Mary Ann was in the hospital for 21 days; leading our church family to put a second story addition on our house for us. The list goes on and on. And while I do feel loved by these things and am amazed that God has provided such, there is still a disconnect. What is the problem? It does not make any sense that I can not see God's love for me in these things and in the truth of his word. God I believe. Help my unbelief! (Mark 9:24) 

Who Knows Me?

I was thinking about how I am thankful for God this morning. I went to Psalm 103, one of my favorites! I am thankful for God's forgiveness:

2 Bless the Lord, O my soul,

and forget not all his benefits,

3 who forgives all your iniquity,

who heals all your diseases,

I am thankful that he redeemed me:

who redeems your life from the pit,

who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, (v. 4)

But one of my favorite lines in this Psalm is verse 7:

He made known his ways to Moses,

his acts to the people of Israel.

I love that God revealed himself to Moses and the people of Israel. And I love the fact that he has revealed himself to all mankind through his word.

He knows me intimately and completely and his desire is that I know him as much as I can! Wow!!! The God of the universe, who created the heavens and the earth knows me and wants me to know him. Amazing!!!

I AM

Tuesday was my last devotion for coop on the “I am” statements of Jesus. We started out singing “I Am the Resurrection and the Life” and then summarized:

The first one is the bread of life. Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.” John 6:35

Jesus can completely satisfy us. I know that sometimes I struggle with running to food, or people, or entertainment (a good story or movie) when I should be going to God. But this verse says that Jesus can satisfy us – we will not hunger or thirst. Jesus can satisfy our spiritual hunger.

The next “I am” is in John 8: “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” Later in John 8 Jesus says,“If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” The truth sets us free from the darkness of our sin.

Jesus makes an incredible claim in John 8:58: “Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am.”

“I am” was a name God used for Himself in the Old Testament. By saying this, Jesus was claiming to be God and is therefore worthy of all worship, honor, glory, and praise! He is the only man in all of history who could make this declaration, because He is the only one who is truly God!

In John 10 Jesus says, “9 I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture. 10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

There was only one door for the sheepfold. Jesus is the only way to be saved and find pasture. Jesus can provide for all of our needs like the pasture – the place where the sheep had their needs met. Jesus came that we may have life abundantly!

Later in John 10 Jesus says, “11 I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep...14 I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, 15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father; and I lay down my life for the sheep.”

Jesus tells Martha, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?”

Resurrection implies death. Jesus showed his power over death by raising Lazarus from the dead. Then he himself died for us and rose again. When he died, he took on all our sin and the guilt of our sin and we took on his righteousness. Amazing!

Jesus makes an incredibly exclusive statement in John 14: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Jesus is the only way to God, the only way to heaven. One can't get there following any other religion or even trying to do good things to earn their way there. Jesus is the way and the only way.

Finally, in John 15 Jesus says, “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser...4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”

There is a huge contrast between those who remain in the vine and bear much fruit, and those who don't remain in the vine. They “can do nothing” and wither and die. We need to stay connected to our source of life, Jesus, and daily be receiving our sustenance from him.

If we believe in Jesus, we should “bear much fruit and so prove to be his disciples.” If not, than why not believe today?

Romans 10:9 states, “if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”

 John 15 says, “8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples.”

Apart From Me You Can Do Nothing

Here are some thoughts from the devotional I did for homeschool coop:

John 15:1-11

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. 9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.”

First we want to see how important Jesus is. He is the source of life for the branches! What happens if the branches do not remain in the vine? They wither and die. What if the branches remain? They bear much fruit. Notice the huge contrast: dying vs. bearing much fruit!

What does it mean to abide or remain? Verses 3 and 7 give us a clue. “Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you.” and “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.” We need to be listening to and believing Jesus' words and praying to him.

“Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” This last part of verse 5 has made an impression on me for a long time: “apart from me you can do nothing.” I know there are a lot of things I think I can do without God. I'd like to think that, but it is simply not true! God made me to begin with, and “he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything.” (from Acts 17:25). When I am desperate and feeling needy I cry out to him for help. But other times I feel confident and competent in my abilities. “I got this, God”- I don't really say that, but I show that I feel that way by my lack of dependence and crying out to him. Even with the devotions I am doing – I feel comfortable with them. But I know from scripture that apart from God's work through his Holy Spirit, my efforts will be useless and fruitless, and could even be harmful if I am giving others the impression that I can do it all without God. So every time I pray, “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” Psalm 19:14

"Abide in me, and I in you.”

Is There Something Wrong with God?

When I read this passage from Jeremiah 2, I usually focus on verse 13:

" for my people have committed two evils:
they have forsaken me,
the fountain of living waters,
and hewed out cisterns for themselves,
broken cisterns that can hold no water." 

And I wonder to myself why I would ever want to hew a broken cistern for myself when I could have God's delicious, completely satisfying fountain of living waters. But the other day when I read it, I was struck by verse 5:

“What wrong did your fathers find in me
that they went far from me,
and went after worthlessness, and became worthless?" 

I asked myself what wrong have I found in God that I would not go to Him every time and go after, if not worthless, inferior things?
God made the heavens and earth. He is faithful and perfectly loving and has provided for all of my needs. So why am I even tempted to go after or worship the created things rather than the Creator, who is forever to be praised?

from Jeremiah 2:

5 Thus says the Lord:

“What wrong did your fathers find in me
that they went far from me,
and went after worthlessness, and became worthless?
6 They did not say, ‘Where is the Lord
who brought us up from the land of Egypt,
who led us in the wilderness,
in a land of deserts and pits,
in a land of drought and deep darkness,
in a land that none passes through,
where no man dwells?’
7 And I brought you into a plentiful land
to enjoy its fruits and its good things.
But when you came in, you defiled my land
and made my heritage an abomination.
8 The priests did not say, ‘Where is the Lord?’
Those who handle the law did not know me;
the shepherds[a] transgressed against me;
the prophets prophesied by Baal
and went after things that do not profit.
9 “Therefore I still contend with you,
declares the Lord,
and with your children's children I will contend.
10 For cross to the coasts of Cyprus and see,
or send to Kedar and examine with care;
see if there has been such a thing.
11 Has a nation changed its gods,
even though they are no gods?
But my people have changed their glory
for that which does not profit.
12 Be appalled, O heavens, at this;
be shocked, be utterly desolate,
declares the Lord,
13 for my people have committed two evils:
they have forsaken me,
the fountain of living waters,
and hewed out cisterns for themselves,
broken cisterns that can hold no water.